‘A long way. A big mountain to climb’: Inside Matt Murray’s emotional journey back to the NHL

BUFFALO, NY – Matt Murray looked up at the scoreboard above him, counted down the seconds as they ticked away, and finally pumped his fist.

It had been 638 days since Murray last felt the feeling wash over him.

Bilateral hip surgery forced the Toronto Maple Leafs goaltender out of the entire 2023-2024 season, the last of a four-year contract. There was no guarantee that the oft-injured Murray would play in the NHL again. A one-year contract offered him a lifeline to continue grinding well out of the AHL spotlight with just one goal.

And over a year and a half later, Murray was back where he had been fighting to be: in the NHL win column after stopping 24 shots in a 6-3 win over the Buffalo Sabres.

“A long road. A big mountain to climb. But I kept this moment in front of me on the days when it felt tough,” Murray said.

The 30-year-old’s eyes grew redder with every word he said after the match. His voice quivered.

“A big release,” he said, struggling to find the words to put nearly two years away from the NHL into perspective. “A rush of emotions.”

The typical goalkeeper hugs with teammates after victory were tighter, longer. In a physical game where a player’s career can turn on a dime, Murray’s return resonated far more than the 2 points the Leafs also added on the day.

“It’s good to see (Murray) smile,” Steven Lorentz said, “because you know he’s back doing what he loves.”

In the locker room, Max Domi immediately presented Murray with the team’s WWE-style wrestling belt as the player of the game. Murray’s up-and-down performance was secondary.

“He got that thing, 100 percent, he deserved it,” Domi said. “The ability to stick with it mentally, out of all those days where I’m sure he was very doubtful, that goes a long way to recovery. We’re all super proud of him.”

It’s easy to quantify how long Murray’s road back to the NHL was these days: 628 of them between his last two appearances.

It is far more difficult to describe exactly how difficult that path is.

Injuries have dogged Murray throughout his career after winning back-to-back Stanley Cup titles in his first two seasons in the NHL with the Pittsburgh Penguins. His games played decreased every season from 2018 to 2022. After being traded to the Leafs in the summer of 2022, he struggled through his first season. It was fair to wonder if hip surgery would be the final dagger in his NHL career.

But Murray would still hang with teammates at the Leafs’ practice facility during his rehab last season, feeling so close yet so far away from the league he once conquered.

“The fact that he’s just coming back here says a lot about his character, his dedication to the game,” Lorentz said.

Murray kept a stall full of his equipment at this facility, which was never used. An important and humane gesture from the Leafs organization, but still a reminder that Murray didn’t play NHL games.

Even after re-signing with the Leafs on a one-year, $875,000 deal, he felt like the organization’s No. 4 goalkeeper. When the Leafs needed a netminder to replace the injured Anthony Stolarz, they called on Dennis Hildeby. The lanky Hildeby is seven years younger than Murray.

How could Murray not wonder if his return to the NHL would ever come?

“There were definitely times when it felt really difficult,” Murray said. “But every time I felt like that, I had a great group of people around me. That’s the only reason I’m here.”

All Murray could do was work his tail off, far away from the public eye, and quietly hope for the return that finally came on Friday night.

“Emotions were high today,” Murray said.

Those emotions were perhaps highest before the match. The typically stoic Murray allowed himself to stop and appreciate how far he has come.

“I was able to take a moment in warmups and during the anthem and look around and appreciate the long journey it’s been and think about all the people who helped me get here,” Murray said.

It was the kind of game that reminded the crowd of the fragility of an NHL career. Just a few short years separated Murray from being a Stanley Cup winner to essentially being written out of the NHL, essentially before the age of 30.

“You feel for a guy like that because he works so hard and he wants it so bad,” Lorentz said. “We’re all rooting for him.”

Murray moved well enough in his return. He swallowed most of the 27 shots the Sabers threw at him and looked like the veteran he is. Murray had two goals against called back after video review. His big save on Sabers forward Alex Tuch was a reminder of the athletic ability he can deliver now that he’s also fully healthy.

They are all qualities that Leafs fans may have forgotten. But those are qualities that remain the focus of Murray’s Leafs teammates.

“It hasn’t been forgotten in my mind what he’s accomplished in this league in his career,” said Leafs forward Max Pacioretty, himself no stranger to debilitating career-threatening injuries. “It’s hard to almost remember what you’ve done, what you’ve achieved because it seems like all the noise is always in the moment, whether it’s the injury or what’s happened lately.”

Perhaps the Leafs win could have been predicted beforehand. Sure, they played a wobbly Sabers team that has now reeled off 12 straight losses. And they were lifted by an upstart, white-hot line of Max Domi, Bobby McMann and Nick Robertson. They are the third line in name only: The trio combined for three goals and 6 points against the Sabres.

But the opponent should not belittle what was in mind, not only for Murray, but also for the Leafs in Buffalo. They wanted to do right by a player who has done everything in his power to return to the NHL. You didn’t have to squint to see a defenseman like Jake McCabe throw the Sabers out of Murray’s fold with a little extra gusto.

“It gives you an incentive to go the extra mile because you know (Murray) has gone the extra mile just to get back to this position where he’s on the right,” Lorentz said. “It’s not like he was half-bad to get back to this point and he expected to be here. The kind of surgeries and injuries that he’s been through can hamper your career for a long time. You might never come back to your old form.”

But Murray is working on getting back to the old Matt Murray. And the Leafs’ need for Murray doesn’t end when they head north on the QEW back to Toronto.

The earliest Stolarz is likely to return from a knee injury will be mid-to-late January. Hildeby doesn’t exactly have the full trust of the Leafs organization right now after allowing a pair of soft goals during a recent call-up against the Sabers at home, coupled with a less-than-stellar AHL season thus far. He will likely be an NHL player down the road, but there is room for him to grow and develop more confidence in his game.

But Murray has what no other goaltender in the Leafs organization has: experience. And it matters to Brad Treliving and Craig Berube: Both value plays and would rather lean on veterans whenever possible.

They will lean on Murray because of everything he has done and been through in his career.

After Friday night, that career looks drastically different.

“Really, you have to take each day as it comes and you never know when it’s all over,” Pacioretty said. “So you don’t want to take days for granted.”

After Murray had wiped his eyes and slowly removed the kilos of goalkeeping gear heavy with sweat, he sat alone in the dressing room. The Leafs equipment staff all stopped unloading bags from the locker room to give him a quiet pat on the back.

Murray looked up to see a note written on a board in the locker room. The Leafs bus would be leaving in 20 minutes. There was another NHL game on the horizon.

He could smile again knowing that surely 628 days will not pass between being able to do what he loved.

(Top photo: Timothy T. Ludwig / Imagn Images)