Cher considered jumping off the balcony during Sonny Bono marriage

In her new memoir, Cher recalls a dark moment in her “loveless marriage” to Sonny Bono, when she considered jumping off the balcony of her Las Vegas hotel room (via People).

The incident took place in 1972, three years after Cher and Bono officially married. (Cher was 16 and Bono 27 when they met in 1962; they had an unofficial wedding ceremony in 1964.) At the time, the couple was wildly popular thanks to their numerous hit songs and their amazing TV show, The Sonny & Cher Comedy Hour. But professional success did not bring it personal fulfillment.

Cher describes Bono as controlling in the book, writing that she began to feel “trapped” in their marriage. Standing on the balcony of her Vegas hotel, then aged just 26, Cher recalled: “I was dizzy with loneliness. I saw how easy it would be to step over the edge and just disappear. For a few crazy minutes I could can’t imagine any other option. I did it five or six times.”

Cher said that thoughts of her family kept her from going through with it, as well as the worry that “things like this might make people who look up to me feel like it’s a viable solution.” Cher also said her experience in Vegas led her to a particularly important realization.

“I don’t need to jump off,” she wrote. “I can just leave him.” (Cher and Bono separated not long after, filing for divorce in 1974 and finalizing the split the following year.)

Cher’s New Memoir – Short Title Cher, The Memoir: Part One – arriving today, November 19. The book covers her early life as Cherilyn Sarkisian through her rise to fame and relationship with Bono. The second part of the memoir is expected to be published next year.

Last night Cher showed up The Tonight Showwhere she talked about her experience writing the book, admitting: “It was a bitch. It doesn’t go through your life that hard. But I did it a couple of times because the first time it didn’t work out. The second time I wanted just don’t tell anything. And then I thought, ‘You know what? Give the money back.’ It’s hard because when you tell your life, there are parts you want to guard.”

The recent Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inductee also confirmed that she had some new music on the way. Near the end of the interview, Jimmy Fallon asked if she wanted to make another album, and Cher replied, “I’m about to.”

Call 988 in the US to reach National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. The Trevor Projectwhich provides help and suicide prevention resources for LGBTQ youth, is 1-866-488-7386. Find other international suicide helplines at Befrienders Worldwide (befrienders.org).