‘Survivor’ Season 47 Episode 8 Recap: Dumb Money

Survivor

He is all that

Season 47

Section 8

Editor’s assessment

3 stars

***

Photo: Robert Voets/CBS

get”Survivor classics” have been enhanced by the new era. There are only two cases I can think of: getting a proper theme song back and Survivor auction. I’ve never loved the auction where players offer food rewards and benefits that could be feasts, game changers or a bottle of dirty water. Everyone got the same amount in cash. It was basically a matter of who could be the first to yell, “Jeff, you can have all my money!”

But in the new era, it’s actually kind of exciting. Players must search for bamboo tubes hidden throughout the camp with varying amounts of money in them. Sierra is excellent at finding them, knocking mostly on just over a thousand piglets. However, Andy is as terrible at this as he is at not passing out on the first day of the game. The editors save him even worse than they did Rome before his expulsion. He passes by a bamboo sitting on top of a pile of stones and doesn’t see it. He tells his supposed ally Genevieve that he just wants to find one, walks past a pipe in a cliff face, and she grabs it as soon as he passes and puts it in the bank. Lady, at least give Andy a little scratch.

This actually works in Andy’s favor because the person left with the most money at the end of the auction loses their vote at Tribal Council. Jeff pulls the number of auction items out of a bag so the players have no idea when it will stop. I like that this is all about strategy: How can the players maximize their reward by minimizing their threat? The easiest thing for players with lots of money is to just pick an item, bet the farm and hope that under Jeff’s pretty little cover is a burrito instead of two fish eyes. I like that some of the dishes this time come with cash back to make the strategy more complicated and one thing – sorry to Survivor Outwit, Outlast, Out-Breakfast Sunrise Spectacular, but Moons Over My Hammy will continue to be the only iconic breakfast name – where players will compete in a classic “eating gross stuff” challenge.

My favorite moment is when Kyle buys a plate of Buffalo wings, but he tells Jeff that he’s been vegan for six years and only recently became a vegetarian just so he’d have more things he could eat if he was chosen to play on show. He then decides that he will go against his convictions and dig right in. Jeff asks him why he does that. “Well, because you have not done us the decency to give us a little bit of rice, so my hunger has forced me to abandon my morals,” he says. Just kidding. He just said he was hungry.

There’s enough to keep the auction exciting, and I love that it took up quite a bit of the episode and showed our players having the time of their lives. I also love that there are no benefits to selling. In the past, everyone sat on their hands and waited for the item that would give them an advantage, but when they knew it wasn’t coming, they threw money around like venture capitalists on a ketamine hook.

The one person who gets a reward is Rachel. In her bucket of fritters is a scroll telling her that a hidden immunity idol is sewn into the corner of the tarp in the middle of the camp. Like Sue’s Red-Handed Idol, this is another good way to hide it: It’s plain to see and treacherous to get, but not so hard that it’s downright scary. Rachel, ever the champ, manages to rip it out while everyone at the shelter ignores her.

After the auction, it seems that old Lavo (red like lava) and old Gata (yellow like soft) will get together and pick off the remaining Tuku (blue like suede shoes) one by one, starting with Kyle who keeps winning immunity challenges . I’m so mad I have to remember the stupid pre-merger tribal names. We have seen this in every season of the “new era.” The small strains lead to intense bonding and forced voice blocks, so people never come to the merge saying, “Oh, I found new friends to work with; let’s turn the game upside down.” No, they always stick to their numbers as long as they possibly can, which makes the second phase of the game pretty boring. Go back to two tribes! Or better yet, try a season of no tribes. Just plunk everyone down on the same beach and let them figure it out. They can divide themselves into groups.

At the Immunity Challenge, it’s another Survivor Classic: Keep a bucket in the air as long as you can and the last one wins. But Jeff has a twist. There will be both a male winner and a female winner. To prove it, Jeff produces an exact replica of the immunity necklace that a member of Hordak’s Horde seemingly united in an attack on all retinas everywhere. Couldn’t they have classed up the ladies necklace just a little bit? Couldn’t we spare a rhinestone? A bangle? Nothing?

Poor Sue, who wins the challenge and has to wear the ugly bat signal around her neck. Of course she won: This challenge is all about strength-to-weight ratio, and Sue is both short and strong, giving her the easiest path to victory. After Sue wins, she gives us a whole speech in the confessional about how people of all ages should turn to Survivor to show that they can do it. During the auction, after Sierra won her margarita, she joked that she shared a margin with Jeff Probst. He shot back that if you want to do it, apply to be on Survivor. Then we got the weekly commercial about how we all had to apply to be on the show. Okay, what’s up with this? No one searching anymore? Are they scraping the bottom of the barrel? Why do they have to convince us, people who are already tuned in to the show, to come out and play on our favorite show? Who else do they hope will apply? Shouldn’t they try to show these advertisements under e.g. The challenge or something and get some newbies up to speed on this piece?

Anyway, Kyle also wins immunity (again: strong guy, not a lot of body weight), so two of the former Tuku are safe. But as soon as they get back to camp, Genevieve tries to gather the other Lavo and the Tuku to get the Gata out. She thinks they are more dangerous, more charismatic and tighter as a group. This seems to solidify when Andy realizes that Sam and Sierra are just amusing him and will discard him when it suits them. So while Andy and Genevieve are ready to make some big moves, they aren’t thinking about forming a new coalition; they think of just adapting the existing ones. It just aligns Lavo with Tuku instead of with Gata.

There is some disagreement about who they will vote for – Sam, Sierra or Rachel – so there is uncertainty around Tribal. After what seemed like an uneventful trial, Rachel decides to play her shot in the dark, and she’s not sure, but she’s sticking with her idol. The votes are tied between Sam and Sierra. Because Sam lost his vote at the auction, Sierra can vote, but he doesn’t. Her vote is the only one cast for Sam and she goes home. She was the best choice because she was the only one who kept Sam and Rachel together. Now that Gata is completely broken, a smart player could take them and try to create a new alliance, something with three or four people that could see them through. However, that probably won’t happen; it will just be more Tribal crap until the final five. The new era can’t fix everything, but at least it got it fixed Survivor auction.